Bananas...

Here's another one. I have a banana tree in my living room. It's actually my second banana tree. My first tree just died because...don't get me started. So I bought a second. The second did really well. It was probably four feet tall by the end of September. I was so happy!

It had outgrown it's pot for the third time so I decided to just replant it in a garbage can to avoid having to replant it ever again. Several days after the transplant we had a cold snap and it...killed...my...tree.

I don't know what idiot spirit possessed me, but I thought maybe I could save this dead plant if I brought it inside. So I did. That poor dead tree sat in the corner, being dead for a month. The day I finally accepted it was committed to being dead I saw the smallest green wisp. My heart leaped for joy!!!

Isn't it lovely!

After many months of love and care, my banana is thriving and it's wonderful, but we have an added bonus! Gnats!

Less lovely!

 We can't seem to get rid of them. I know it might help if I take Banana outside, but I don't think I'll get a second miracle should it die again. It's okay, I like having constant activity in my peripherals and feeling like something is flying up my nose. It's my favorite when I feel like my skin is crawling because it totally is! I also enjoy squishing and then smearing tiny bodies across my computer and or cell phone screen, both of which are touch screen. You can imagine what that leads to. Fun times.

It's All Fun and Games...

I am a clusterfudge.

It is a well documented fact, but I can't let that little fact keep me from getting stuff done.  I can't live in a plastic bubble, even though my kids think I'd be safer there. We bought a wood chipper because we have a wood pile in the back yard where a family of raccoons has taken up residence. My dog wouldn't stay away from the pile, but more importantly, raccoons climb fences making the fence I put around my garden ineffective and that made me see red.

So we bought this wood chipper, and knowing that I am prone to accident, I make sure to wear eye protection and gloves whenever I use it. I don't stick my hand in the opening to dislodge anything that might be stuck. I even cover the opening so nothing can be spat into my face and yet...One of the branches slapped me yesterday.

That was the last straw of the day.

I had mowed the lawn earlier in the afternoon and it is a pitiful machine. It shakes and rattles like a ninety year old man, and as a result, one of the bolts, holding the handle on, worked itself loose. So with one detached handle, I took the mower and push it, backwards, into the garage.

Did you know there is a small part above the body, but below the engine that gets really, really hot? I do...now. I found it with my big toe. Yes, I was mowing in flip flips, but I'm not worried about cutting off my toes. No, no. That's too mundane for me. See, I'd get my foot caught in the mower because I was wearing close toed shoes.

I trip on my flip flops. I bruise my own boobs, hit myself in the face, and scratch my own arms when I break branches to put in the chipper. My fingernails get in my way. How the hell does that happen? It's so freaking annoying.

I went to dip my toe in a bucket of water after I burned it. I didn't quite raise my foot high enough and slammed the same damn toe into the side of the bucket...

Sometimes it takes everything I have just to get through the day.